"Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace and gratitude." Denis Waitley
I am sitting here this morning "shaming myself" for not getting done what I think I "should" be accomplishing. Change is blossoming all around me and to a certain extent I am immobilized by it. It's an exciting time in my life, but good forward leaps can be just as stressful as challenging ones. One thing I am observing in myself is the thought loop of "I will get on track when...." (the house closes, I move, my condo rents, I become a senior supermodel, I've bleached my teeth, I have a million dollars, my butt is smaller....you know the deal.) However, as I have written before, life continues to present hurdles for us to go over. It's how we learn, grow and become more of who we are meant to be. Embracing this idea helps me step back and examine what I can today to live with love, grace and gratitude.
Another piece to this equation for me is to let some things go. What TRULY needs my attention and what can I let go?
I am not up to date with my thank-yous and obviously haven't posted to this blog. I have created a great amount of stress thinking about how my note writing is getting away from me. How am I going to catch up from about 10 days of not attending to my thank you notes? What a problem of "luxury."
Today is the day that we have. I don't need to go back to a week of yesterday's and attempt to find 10 people to thank. That would be mechanical and not heart-felt. So it takes me 1 1/2 years to write 365 notes. Big whoop-de-do.
My lesson today is to quiet my mind long enough to appreciate the gifts around me and be grateful. I need to step back into my daily practice without judgment around how I let things get away from me. I need to do this in all areas of my world.
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
WHATEVER
Life is whirling and twirling. (especially because I have had 2 cups of java on an empty stomach.) 60 thank you notes ago I wrote a blog on John Kralik's book: 365 Thank yous. As you know, that was the inspiration for my daily practice of acknowledging others in writing. He wrote about how sending daily thank you notes transformed his life. In the back of my mind I said "whatever." So you got financial gain, true friendship, weight loss and inner peace John. Good for you. My motivation wasn't to test if this would be the case for me. I pretended that it was all about giving without getting. Let's face it, we know that we receive more than we get when we are doing service for others. Research on gratitude illustrates that point. My confession is....I did want to get something back.
My life has really changed. You too can say "Whatever Gratitude Girl." I believe that the universe is showering me with blessings.
Things have happened in my world in the past few months that I would never have predicted. I am in the midst of getting a house. I have lived in this tiny condo with my children since I moved out and separated from my X-husband 6 1/2 years ago. My now 14 year old son, who is 5'8" has been sharing a small room with his brother in bunk beds for all those years. He doesn't want to stay here because he has no privacy. I really can't have guests over because I live in a thimble. It's a beautiful thimble...but none the less. I don't have the means to buy a house. All of a sudden my x-husband decides that he would like to buy us a house ( for me to buy back) so the boys could have a real home. Now, how many women have an X that does that? I would venture to say 1% of the population.
I have a house under contract right now. I just started a job that I love. New spiritual friends are starting to weave their way into my life.
2 months ago I would never have imagined any of this. I have been learning to live in a place of gratitude and seeing great gifts in life since I started this blog. Did all this materialize because I started writing thank you notes? You can call me crazy, but to some extent I think that it played a role. Seeing the world as a beautiful place is a gift in itself.
I am going to start writing about some of the experiences I have had in response to my writing thank you notes going forward. It's been wonderful.
Try writing 7 notes this week. Address the envelopes and send one a day. See what happens.
My life has really changed. You too can say "Whatever Gratitude Girl." I believe that the universe is showering me with blessings.
Things have happened in my world in the past few months that I would never have predicted. I am in the midst of getting a house. I have lived in this tiny condo with my children since I moved out and separated from my X-husband 6 1/2 years ago. My now 14 year old son, who is 5'8" has been sharing a small room with his brother in bunk beds for all those years. He doesn't want to stay here because he has no privacy. I really can't have guests over because I live in a thimble. It's a beautiful thimble...but none the less. I don't have the means to buy a house. All of a sudden my x-husband decides that he would like to buy us a house ( for me to buy back) so the boys could have a real home. Now, how many women have an X that does that? I would venture to say 1% of the population.
I have a house under contract right now. I just started a job that I love. New spiritual friends are starting to weave their way into my life.
2 months ago I would never have imagined any of this. I have been learning to live in a place of gratitude and seeing great gifts in life since I started this blog. Did all this materialize because I started writing thank you notes? You can call me crazy, but to some extent I think that it played a role. Seeing the world as a beautiful place is a gift in itself.
I am going to start writing about some of the experiences I have had in response to my writing thank you notes going forward. It's been wonderful.
Try writing 7 notes this week. Address the envelopes and send one a day. See what happens.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
FIFTY
I have my fiftieth thank you note addressed and ready to write and debating if I embarrass myself. Here is the story:
Earlier this week I noticed an unpleasant odor in my house. Step One: Take out the garbage. Step Two: Clean out the refrigerator. Step Three: Examine the garbage disposal. Damn it's still there. It was a mysterious scent and I couldn't put my finger on it. Step Four: Parade neighbors through. It's fairly entertaining to watch people walk around the house sniffing everything and trying to put a label to the aroma. I have used odor, scent and aroma...but the truth is...it was an awful over-whelming stink.
By the 3rd day I was beginning to feel less than ideal. My body hurt, my head ached and my eyes burned. Late Saturday night I decided I would call X-cel energy. The fellow came over in a speedy 3 hours, arriving at midnight. He told us wasn't a gas or carbon monoxide problem and he had never smelled anything like it. Great. Off we went to sleep elsewhere.
The next morning it was worse. The smell bowled you over when you walked through the door. Being a titch mellow dramatic, I had a bit of a breakdown. (God why me? sort of scene.) Who do I call now? It was Sunday...who do you call? I made an inquiry to the fire department. They told me they would come but I had to call 911 to dispatch them out. They came and searched my condo from top to bottom. It appeared that the odor was concentrated in my boy's room. The challenge there, is that it looks like I could be on an episode of hoarders. However, nothing is organized into categories. I think that is what hoarders do..yes? The closet was piled HIGH with clean and dirty clothing. My cleaning people tend to throw all the stuff on the floor in their room in the closet. (side note: I give up eating dessert to have others clean my bathrooms for me....thus the decadence of others throwing crap in my closets.)
They departed. They did find something semi-dangerous attached to my condo units...so it wasn't a total waste.
The Firemen suggested that I close all the doors and see if we get any more clues to it's location. (4 days and I hadn't thought of that. I truly believe our mystery smell was compromising me.) Location: Boy's Room.
After sleeping some place other than home again....my son and I returned Monday morning to bravely attack the room from hell. We are moving in about a month...so it was a necessary evil any way. I threw bags and bags of old clothing, toys, papers and weird shit out. I drove to the donation box down the street 3 times. We were down smelling the carpet. Not a clue. The room is utterly organized but the room still smells. The only thing left is the back pack on the chair. That's right. It's in the pocket of the pack. One moldy orange peel from who knows when. It was green and pungent it was MOLD. Holy shit. How could something that small permeate an entire household.
This brings me back to the thank you card. Do I write station #5? Do I look like a wacky woman? "Hey firemen...I am the girl that calls 911 for a moldy orange peel. Thank you for the fun Sunday afternoon." We all know the answer is yes.
The silver lining is that we are packed and ready to rock and roll.....and I have recovered 20 pairs of socks. That is no lie...20.
Earlier this week I noticed an unpleasant odor in my house. Step One: Take out the garbage. Step Two: Clean out the refrigerator. Step Three: Examine the garbage disposal. Damn it's still there. It was a mysterious scent and I couldn't put my finger on it. Step Four: Parade neighbors through. It's fairly entertaining to watch people walk around the house sniffing everything and trying to put a label to the aroma. I have used odor, scent and aroma...but the truth is...it was an awful over-whelming stink.
By the 3rd day I was beginning to feel less than ideal. My body hurt, my head ached and my eyes burned. Late Saturday night I decided I would call X-cel energy. The fellow came over in a speedy 3 hours, arriving at midnight. He told us wasn't a gas or carbon monoxide problem and he had never smelled anything like it. Great. Off we went to sleep elsewhere.
The next morning it was worse. The smell bowled you over when you walked through the door. Being a titch mellow dramatic, I had a bit of a breakdown. (God why me? sort of scene.) Who do I call now? It was Sunday...who do you call? I made an inquiry to the fire department. They told me they would come but I had to call 911 to dispatch them out. They came and searched my condo from top to bottom. It appeared that the odor was concentrated in my boy's room. The challenge there, is that it looks like I could be on an episode of hoarders. However, nothing is organized into categories. I think that is what hoarders do..yes? The closet was piled HIGH with clean and dirty clothing. My cleaning people tend to throw all the stuff on the floor in their room in the closet. (side note: I give up eating dessert to have others clean my bathrooms for me....thus the decadence of others throwing crap in my closets.)
They departed. They did find something semi-dangerous attached to my condo units...so it wasn't a total waste.
The Firemen suggested that I close all the doors and see if we get any more clues to it's location. (4 days and I hadn't thought of that. I truly believe our mystery smell was compromising me.) Location: Boy's Room.
After sleeping some place other than home again....my son and I returned Monday morning to bravely attack the room from hell. We are moving in about a month...so it was a necessary evil any way. I threw bags and bags of old clothing, toys, papers and weird shit out. I drove to the donation box down the street 3 times. We were down smelling the carpet. Not a clue. The room is utterly organized but the room still smells. The only thing left is the back pack on the chair. That's right. It's in the pocket of the pack. One moldy orange peel from who knows when. It was green and pungent it was MOLD. Holy shit. How could something that small permeate an entire household.
This brings me back to the thank you card. Do I write station #5? Do I look like a wacky woman? "Hey firemen...I am the girl that calls 911 for a moldy orange peel. Thank you for the fun Sunday afternoon." We all know the answer is yes.
The silver lining is that we are packed and ready to rock and roll.....and I have recovered 20 pairs of socks. That is no lie...20.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Sunday, May 29, 2011
DON'T PAY AT THE PUMP
Wow, a week has past without the inspiration to write. I have been "getting through." I have this " I will land on solid ground when...." attitude. I will be good when I start my new job, when I get my new house, when my parent's come and go back home. Getting through is not living in the present, nor is it a place where I practice gratitude.
My parent's just left. They came for my son's 5th grade graduation. Holy smokes...it's quite the production. I have a "parental hangover" as my dear friend calls it. My inner 12 year old feels a bit judged. At 47 you would think I would be over needing my parent's approval. Guess again. It's evidence that I am currently not spiritually fit. So, I decided I would be grateful for qualities I like in them.
My Dad loves to stay in B&B's. He is probably the most social person I know. He creates friendship and connectedness where ever he goes. When they departed, my father had gathered a number of emails from his "new friends" at the Inn. One couple will be passing though my home town and they are invited to stop by. That is how I was raised. Both my parent's have done volunteer work since I can remember.
My father is an inspiration. He lives his life truly connecting with people. He acknowledges others and makes them feel listened to and affirmed. I could go on and on giving you examples of how he creates connections, but I will just give you one...as I am exhausted. I will do a more heart-filled tribute to my father some other time.
He doesn't pay at the gas pump. He feels that the person inside behind the counter might like a friendly smile and a quick hello. I like this philosophy. We can go about our lives without making contact with the people who are right in front of us. So often I see people on their phones when they are in the grocery line. How about hanging up and acknowledging that someone is being of service to you?
Last week I drove by a lemonade stand. The little children were waving their hands in the air saying "Please stop, please stop." I drove by like I usually do. Then...I turned around. There was an opportunity to create some joy. I got out of the car and they started screaming "She's coming, she's coming." It felt good.
My challenge to you is to ask yourself "what can I do to acknowledge and connect with others today?" Enjoy the beauty surrounding you.
My parent's just left. They came for my son's 5th grade graduation. Holy smokes...it's quite the production. I have a "parental hangover" as my dear friend calls it. My inner 12 year old feels a bit judged. At 47 you would think I would be over needing my parent's approval. Guess again. It's evidence that I am currently not spiritually fit. So, I decided I would be grateful for qualities I like in them.
My Dad loves to stay in B&B's. He is probably the most social person I know. He creates friendship and connectedness where ever he goes. When they departed, my father had gathered a number of emails from his "new friends" at the Inn. One couple will be passing though my home town and they are invited to stop by. That is how I was raised. Both my parent's have done volunteer work since I can remember.
My father is an inspiration. He lives his life truly connecting with people. He acknowledges others and makes them feel listened to and affirmed. I could go on and on giving you examples of how he creates connections, but I will just give you one...as I am exhausted. I will do a more heart-filled tribute to my father some other time.
He doesn't pay at the gas pump. He feels that the person inside behind the counter might like a friendly smile and a quick hello. I like this philosophy. We can go about our lives without making contact with the people who are right in front of us. So often I see people on their phones when they are in the grocery line. How about hanging up and acknowledging that someone is being of service to you?
Last week I drove by a lemonade stand. The little children were waving their hands in the air saying "Please stop, please stop." I drove by like I usually do. Then...I turned around. There was an opportunity to create some joy. I got out of the car and they started screaming "She's coming, she's coming." It felt good.
My challenge to you is to ask yourself "what can I do to acknowledge and connect with others today?" Enjoy the beauty surrounding you.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
MAXI PADS ON THE PUFF
Today this post is a collaborate event. It's the Birthday of our marvelous, beautiful, creative, spiritual, gorgeous, phenomenal, joyful, heartful, loving friend that you might know as "work in progress." We are called Dark Secret. The four of us went to college together many moons ago. 27 years to be exact.
We shared the passage into adulthood. We are lucky to still have each other all these years later. We email at least once a day, if not more. Before our visual token of love...we just want to highlight a few of our times together:
Our dorm floor was always playing practical jokes on one another. One day, as our birthday girl was walking up the stairs to her room, she spots a fluffy white thing in the parking lot. "Look at that poor girls car....they have put maxi pads over the entire vehicle." She says. Dear friend...that would be your car. From then on the car was called Puff. She was never the same, as the adhesive strips were dog gone hard to get off. We traveled in Puff. We slept in Puff. However, I don't think anyone had "relations" in puff.
We have so many adventures that we could share. We did lip sync in a "disco" bar to a Joan Armatrading song "I love it when you call me names" We were dressed in leather sporting whips. We did not win. What a surprise.
This is for you our friend. The woman with a soul deeper than the ocean...utterly intelligent and beautiful. She who makes us smile, laugh until we cry and shares healing words and wisdom. May this day be the best day ever...and every day have magic!
We shared the passage into adulthood. We are lucky to still have each other all these years later. We email at least once a day, if not more. Before our visual token of love...we just want to highlight a few of our times together:
Our dorm floor was always playing practical jokes on one another. One day, as our birthday girl was walking up the stairs to her room, she spots a fluffy white thing in the parking lot. "Look at that poor girls car....they have put maxi pads over the entire vehicle." She says. Dear friend...that would be your car. From then on the car was called Puff. She was never the same, as the adhesive strips were dog gone hard to get off. We traveled in Puff. We slept in Puff. However, I don't think anyone had "relations" in puff.
We have so many adventures that we could share. We did lip sync in a "disco" bar to a Joan Armatrading song "I love it when you call me names" We were dressed in leather sporting whips. We did not win. What a surprise.
This is for you our friend. The woman with a soul deeper than the ocean...utterly intelligent and beautiful. She who makes us smile, laugh until we cry and shares healing words and wisdom. May this day be the best day ever...and every day have magic!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!
PLEASE blog hop to writingmywaysober.blogspot.com to see more on the maxi pad girl and friendship. Today's post is about "Dark Secret.
WISH HER A HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Thursday, May 19, 2011
THE EASY BUTTON
A good Tom Robbin's quote can always move me to the right or the left of my current mindset. Years ago I stood in line at a book signing for 3 hours. I was hoping I could convince him to have coffee with me. How delightful it would have been to watch his creative mind in action.
I am sitting here having a Starbuck's Via coffee thingys. The are less than yummy, but I NEEDED some caffeine. "I want it now!" I considered just ingesting the powder. The weather sucks! It's been raining and cold for days on end. The temperature is hovering at 43 degrees today. My iphone weather app is telling me we are in for more of the same. I moved here 10 years ago for the sunshine.
I started a new job on Monday and I am in one of those "chaos clouds." My mantra has been "Oh my god...I can't handle this...there is too much happening." That leads to me watching 5 hours of television on the couch. I admit it, that is what this chick did last night. I am also suffering from PVS (post vacation syndrome.) On the bike trip I didn't have to deal with daily reality. Then I come back and my world was/is going 100 miles an hour.
I am taking myself too seriously. How utterly exciting that I get to be in this world fully. I decided that instead of saying that I am over-whelmed with anxiety, I would tell myself that "I am tickled with anticipation." I learned a long time ago that I can not exist in the "I will be happy when...." space. I opened a book today and what was the quote: "I have learned, in whatsoever state I am in, therewith to be content" -Saint Paul.
I am grateful that my "challenges" are those with great growth potential. I need to stop and be mindful of this. My friend has an "EASY" button from Staples. Have you seen those commercials? I can choose to press that button or make a big hairy deal out of everything.
I have today. I have a choice to live in the present moment and give thanks for what I have. I think today my thank you letter will be to the universe for the blessings it has been showering on me.
What is your mantra and does it need tweaking?
On the thank you note front, as a daily practice it's harder than I thought. I am 4 letters behind. However my motivation continues because I have had beautiful responses to the notes that I have sent.
I am going out to buy the damn button.
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